MY STORY—V.
It was a typical afternoon as she rolled over sluggish from the previous night’s activities with a throbbing headache and her work clothes still on. The smell of stale cigarettes loomed on every article of fabric nearby, lingered throughout her hair, and tainted the aroma of her skin. An unpleasant reminder when she woke, that her life reeked of bad habits. Out of the corner of her eye, a glimpse of last nights sloppy fun was uncovered as she leaned over the side of her bed. The wine bottle was grabbed when staggering in from a night of shots, beer, and drugs, the bottle not making it safely to its desired destination. Her sheets now had grape stained tie dyed splotches as a permanent reminder that she passed out holding purple booze.
Eyes swollen and bloodshot she is squinting through eye slits just barely strong enough to open from exhaustion in search of the remote. The remote will be the means of any entertainment on any typical afternoon hangover. Her stomach begins to growl for fast food munchies, soon to satisfy her empty pit of leftover calories collected from the night before. She orders takeout calling in her dependable comfort food, Chinese combo number five. The moment of shame is here when she slowly opens the door, half alive in hopes that what awaits her will bring forth some life. She tries to look anywhere but in the eyes of the delivery guy who stands before her. She nods looking down grabbing for the food and says goodbye.
She begins to pick up the weeks worth of fast food trash that’s been collecting around her bed. Somewhere on her floor is a phone number that remained lost until it was divinely uncovered. The number is written on the corner of a church bulletin given to her by her loving father several weeks earlier. She looked at the number and began to recall the story and day her father said “we don’t know how to help you anymore. We think you should call Bonnie Wozniak the director of a women’s ministry that deals with healing the heart."
Several weeks earlier her father heard a young women, Michelle give her testimony while visiting their hometown church. Michelle spoke of the experience and relationship she encountered with God through the coaching and life skills training offered at the Pathway Home for women. Michelle had a difficult past and was standing now as a witness to a new beginning free from the bondage of addiction. Immediately Michelle’s story began to pierce the heart of a loving father, in search of the answers to his years of prayers. Michelle’s testimony would become the catalyst for several girls fulfilling their purpose and destiny, starting with mine.
I would like to begin by taking you on a journey to recapture the greatest experience encountered as one young woman learns to live.
I began my volunteer work as a resident of the Pathway Home for women May of 2006. Formerly residing in Norfolk, Virginia I became a Georgia peach after three months in the Pathway Home. I realized early on that years of living in a counterfeit world that glamorizes the lust of the flesh to numb pain, is deception. I had to start over at the age of 30 and find my true identity without the history of my past. I began to search and seek after a new standard of living that was functional and allowing for continued success in my future endeavors. In order to achieve my greatest potential, my old life was buried and I began to find out my new identity set apart from the years of addiction. I will begin to reveal the heart of this ministry through personal experience as a resident, graduate, intern, and volunteer.
The opportunity that each resident receives is a great gift of love and sacrifice from many volunteers, staff, friends, leaders, and teachers. Each girl creates a list of five target growth areas to overcome leading to her summarized growth statement. This is created through extensive one on one coaching throughout the week with a life coach. Each girl meets with Bonnie Wozniak, the director of the women’s ministry and life coach, three times a week. Each girl enters into a commitment and relationship with Bonnie to further understand target areas that contributed to a life controlling factor in destructive behavior. Throughout the journey, in the home, the progression of healing the heart begins to take place and shape. This offers insight into a new beginning focusing on establishing purpose and impact within her life. Each girl is given the opportunity to learn personalized skills necessary for her potential upon graduation, along with a purpose statement for life.
One of the many facets unique to this experience, apart from other facilities, is the community living. The authenticity that is created from the beginning of her journey sets a family friendly environment that welcomes hurting hearts. The individualized work that each girl is able to experience creates a special bond between each of the girls. The home offers an opportunity to live with six other women establishing a standard of living with boundaries. Throughout the week each of the girls will create and offer the home specific talents and gifts unique to the individual. Each girl comes in with various backgrounds and different models of living standards that can be offered as a gain or challenge. The authentic community offers each girl a voice to share, seek others perspective, and insight to living a life in unity.
I have often wondered, besides my faith, what would be the one word that best describes the change in my life. It is perspective. The ministry took the veil of deception off of my eyes and brought clarity to my mind. I had patterned my way of thinking from the perspective that I was a victim of my life’s circumstances. I had learned to react instead of how to respond to challenges that I continually faced each year. Each girl comes in with her own ideas and ways of communicating which often leads to conflict. Bonnie instilled in us practical and useful tools pertaining to perspective through group work. We were dealing with several issues in the house amongst the girls so to gain insight on how each girl sees things differently; Bonnie found six pairs of sunglasses. Each pair of sunglasses had a different shade lens. We had to wear each pair for the day and rotate every hour to experience life through a different lens. Afterwards Bonnie coached us through our personal feelings then allowed us to answer and ask questions that guides our choices. Bonnie uses a coaching approach so we can learn to take ownership of our emotions and the part we played in the story. This is an example of a practical tool that I am grateful to understand through the hard work that is encouraged by our coach in the Pathway Home.
The Pathway Home is the first phase where the girls can use the ministry and time to incubate her heart back to life. This first phase offers several options of residency that is beneficial to the girl to guide her during her length of stay. The choice is decided by the director after interviews and board review based on minimal or extensive history dealing with controlling life issues. Each tract leads towards recapturing a lifestyle that builds relationship, communication, restoration, and authenticity. Each girl will individually experience several personal areas of accomplishments recognized through balloon ceremonies, princess crowning, banquets, and the final day, graduation. Graduation is a final declaration in the first phase to live a life free from life controlling issues and to pursue a successful future.
The second phase, The Gateway Home allows each girl to stay connected and protected within the ministry covering as she embraces a new way of living. The length of stay can vary for each girl, but there is usually a minimum commitment of six months. The Gateway Home offers the same style of authentic community living, continued classes, and connection. Here there is a shift away from the nurture and healing of the heart and a focus on discipleship. Each girl begins to work a suitable job that fits her skills, share in the community finances, serve the ministry, activate into her new lifestyle, and lead the new girls in The Pathway Home. The opportunity is available for each of the graduates to begin to mentor the younger girls who are dealing with similar struggles. Graduates now begin to testify to the advantages of working through the tough times and the gain that is ahead. Once a standard of living is established which feels productive and consistent, we have a banquet dinner to acknowledge the completion of both phases with the Pathway Network, a ministry of REAL CHANGE, Inc. The journey does not end here for some; currently we are developing a new position as an intern within the ministry internship.
The internship is offered to those who have successfully completed both phases of the ministry programs showing continued growth. I am currently the first intern with REAL CHANGE, Inc. and I am directly involved with the beginning picture. I currently assist the director, Bonnie Wozniak in office administration, networking and resourcing with the Pathway girls, assisting her at personal conferences, hosting a home for ministry classes, carpooling girls to appointments, prayer meetings, and I am part of the creative team for the Gateway Home. We are currently creating specific obligations and duties to fulfill as an acting intern for future positions. One important duty the intern has is to establish a community in the Gateway Home that encourages unity and balance. My goal is to stay connected with the women’s ministry to assist Bonnie towards building a bigger establishment that can house greater needs. I never knew why I wanted to complete college until I came to Pathway and gained clarity and perspective. I was considering finishing my nursing degree when I realized its broken hearts I want to help heal not broken limbs. I now continue to choose to keep God the focus of my efforts to assist others in achieving there greatest potential.
I now realize the importance of giving and sacrificial love to a world that is unkind and unforgiving. As the Lord began to lay the need of His people on my heart I was filled with compassion and a stronger desire to touch others. I started a homeless outreach while in Pathway that reaches men and women in Atlanta. We are currently making scarves, collecting hygiene products, food, hats, socks, and writing cards for encouragement. While attending college at I discovered several men and women asking me for food, not money, on the way to class. I decided to get the girls involved in assisting me with bag lunches to bring to Atlanta the nights I have class. It has opened up the possibilities for others to give who can not physically, but can financially. Over Thanksgiving we went out on the streets of Atlanta to offer a kind word and thoughtful gesture involving new attendees who are excited about the vision. Another ministry that I have connected with is Victoria’s Friends which is a ministry that goes into the clubs of Atlanta and supplies Mary Magdalene baskets to the dancers. I was part of an outreach team that visits dancers in the dressing rooms of local clubs, offering free gifts, and a listening ear. The outreach teams provide support that ranges anywhere form a smile and encouragement to counseling and new life options. Similar to the Pathway Home the women who are seeking help are paired with a mentor and life coach to help them discover and fulfill their identity and gifting.
This has been my personal experience as a resident, graduate, intern, and volunteer which has opened up the possibilities of where I am today. One woman, Bonnie Wozniak was willing to invest and shepherd the heart of women who need freedom from a life in bondage. Bonnie operates in sacrificial love and consistent passion, wanting to witness the fulfillment of purpose and destiny in each girl’s life. She was willing to give up a career that produced stable income to follow the tug of the Lord on her heart to open a sanctuary for women. Today she is responsible for two homes and many daughters who live a productive, prosperous life.
It would be an honor to follow in her footsteps and use my personal pain for passion to do the same. I have committed in my heart to fight for those who can not fight for themselves and have lost their voice, the little ones. This leads me to close with my personal purpose statement; I exist to love the unloved and orphaned children offering them a voice of hope and purpose.
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